Shhhh...
Trying to type quietly (?) in my living room as my mom is sleeping on the other couch. Yeah! My mom! She had been mildly threatening a visit all week but I hardly took her seriously, considering the prices of the flights (YYZ to LGA - $800!) but this determined woman got herself a connecting flight through Cleveland (aieee!) with some frequent flier points. So far I'd call it a successful visit! I've only had a few moments of meltdown hysteria, but, in my defence, I am six months pregnant, and she fusses. A lot. I was gripped with a murderous rage yesterday when she screamed - actually screamed, twice - when I got "too close" to traffic waiting to cross the street. Too close being like within eight feet.
But all in all, otherwise fairly laid back and non-controversial! She came bearing gifts of books and articles on mothering, and we had a fun mani/pedi afternoon yesterday. Then we went to one of my favorite Italian restaurants and spent my stepdad's money with abandon (thanks M!). Today I think I will convince all to head downtown for brunch at my most favoritest brunch place, which I never get to go to since it's allll the way down in the East Village, then perhaps on to some shopping, and then maybe we'll go see Wall-E tonight! That should make the husband unit happy and I only live to please him. Hee!
My mom leaves tomorrow morning and then I head in for my last four days before vacation! Sweet, sweet vacation. Thank goodness. I am so done with work for a bit. I was coasting along with lots of work, but nothing crazy pressing, until the last fire drill on Friday afternoon. Kind of two fire drills, really; in my one case, the senior associate just started really contemplating the work needed to be done for next week's depositions and thought he could take me along for his ill-planned ride once he figured out all that he wanted to get done. HAH! I am only slightly ashamed to confess that I kind of hung him out to dry on this one. But honestly! I have been bugging him about preparing for these deps for over a week and did everything I could to prepare on my own, considering his lack of focus and direction, and I am tired of having to pay the price for other people's poor planning - his in particulaire! The other drill was also directly and indisputably caused by the partner not paying particular attention to the regulator's deadline for production on our case and so, after gently reminding him of this point, I had an "urgent request" at 3pm, when I was planning to leave at 5 to meet my mom at my apartment. !!! Managed to get that done with lugging a box of documents home with me. Anyhow, surely you see my well-founded annoyance and frustration. And that's not even including the e-mail updates from all weekend about how my staff doesn't quite understand how to do basic administrative tasks. *clutching hair*
In toto, some of this stuff is making me seriously nostalgic for home (in case you don't know where that is for me, it's Canada...Toronto, specifically). I just miss...space! Parks. Having a freaking car of our own. Grocery shopping (Loblaws...waaaah) in a BIG ASSED STORE, as God in his infinite wisdom intended. Other people my age with children. A job that doesn't suck the life out of me a good 90% of the time. Family. Parking lots. Reasonably priced childcare. I know we're nowhere near ready to make a Big Life Decision like moving back yet but Manhattan can really weigh on a person...especially one used to malls.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Saturday, June 14, 2008
The First of the Great Parenting Debates
Pretty much everyone knows that I have a not very seekrit obsession with online forums (not chat rooms mind you - chatting hurts my head - but more like discussion rooms). Usually these forums are about a whole lot of nothing but the parenting ones are actually pretty informative and marginally a better use of my time. I still can't shake the feeling that I'm a freak of nature in comparison to a lot of the other moms on there, though...everything from where I live, to where I work, to my plans for breastfeeding and vaccinations and child care seem to fall squarely into the minority view. It doesn't make me feel unsure of myself or afraid that I'm going about this all wrong (well, not more than usual, anyway), but it does make me wonder as to how the lack of good examples ("good" in the last loaded sense; just "good" meaning an example I would actually want to follow, that fits with my life) in my life are going to impact how I end up parenting.
Right now, I have no idea what September is going to bring. That's scary enough...and then there's the issue of five and a half months later, when I need to head back into the office. I haven't sorted out the full time vs. flex time issue, or childcare beyond the first few months, or how we're going to manage with J's increasingly stupid travel requirements, etc. Perhaps naively, I have no real fears about how my marriage will be affected. I mean, I know that logically things will be different, but having had the good fortune and sense to marry a hyper-responsible, considerate and hard-working man, it's never even occured to me that he wouldn't pull his weight and more.
This article from the New York Times, however, suggests that this assumption on my part could be a wee bit over-optimistic. It's a long article, but I'd strongly recommend it to anyone who is interested in sex equality issues, especially with regard to co-parenting. It's given me a lot to think about:
Pretty much everyone knows that I have a not very seekrit obsession with online forums (not chat rooms mind you - chatting hurts my head - but more like discussion rooms). Usually these forums are about a whole lot of nothing but the parenting ones are actually pretty informative and marginally a better use of my time. I still can't shake the feeling that I'm a freak of nature in comparison to a lot of the other moms on there, though...everything from where I live, to where I work, to my plans for breastfeeding and vaccinations and child care seem to fall squarely into the minority view. It doesn't make me feel unsure of myself or afraid that I'm going about this all wrong (well, not more than usual, anyway), but it does make me wonder as to how the lack of good examples ("good" in the last loaded sense; just "good" meaning an example I would actually want to follow, that fits with my life) in my life are going to impact how I end up parenting.
Right now, I have no idea what September is going to bring. That's scary enough...and then there's the issue of five and a half months later, when I need to head back into the office. I haven't sorted out the full time vs. flex time issue, or childcare beyond the first few months, or how we're going to manage with J's increasingly stupid travel requirements, etc. Perhaps naively, I have no real fears about how my marriage will be affected. I mean, I know that logically things will be different, but having had the good fortune and sense to marry a hyper-responsible, considerate and hard-working man, it's never even occured to me that he wouldn't pull his weight and more.
This article from the New York Times, however, suggests that this assumption on my part could be a wee bit over-optimistic. It's a long article, but I'd strongly recommend it to anyone who is interested in sex equality issues, especially with regard to co-parenting. It's given me a lot to think about:
- increased "flexibility" in women's work being seen as the reason why she "needs" to do more around the house: the article seems to suggest that this is an issue of perception (so, regardless of what the woman actually does outside the house, the couple perceive her work to be more "flexible," whatever that means!) and perhaps even unconscious "life choiecs" and trade-offs along the way that result in the woman working a more flexible job. I would never have thought my job to be particularly flexible, but from a comparative perspective, it is. My firm is one of the few that actually allows flex-time schedules (what they privately think of it of course is another matter...). J's job, while not quite as demanding in terms of raw hours necessary, simply couldn't contemplate a part-time schedule since he's the manager.
- women asserting control over the home: this isn't talked about explicitly as a control issue in the article but I think that it is, or at least it would be for me. The article is absolutely right in that, seeing that society still largely views the home and parenting as being the woman's primary responsibility, any perceived defects like the children being dressed a little funny or a messy house are assigned to being the woman's "fault." And so women are more invested in the results! Aside from that, however - and this is huge - many women take ownership over household and childcare duties because it sets them up as the "experts" in that particular area. I see it all the time on the mommy boards. Often the same women who complain about their husbands' lack of involvement in the households seem to be pretty smug about how their baby can only be comforted by mommy.
- setting up roles of "master" and "apprentice": I absolutely see how this has already started! It's alarming really. J, bless him, barely still understands what we hired the $1500 doula for. Fair enough; at this point his life hasn't changed quite enough for him to be fully engaged in all of this, and I don't think that's making excuses. But I'm the one who has done the reading on the diapers we'll need, and the stroller I want, and what vaccinations are important and when sleep training should start. I just assumed he'd get up to speed once I explained it all to him and the baby was here, but have we already anticipated and accepted the "helper role" for him?
Of course, the big question that looms over all of this - assuming that such idyllic co-parenting is even possible and desirable - is now...are we really willing to play ball? This isn't just about J stepping up, of course; I'm talking about me. Would sharing the household tasks mean that I'd have to start taking out the garbage? Giving the dog his baths? Learn how to make coffee that doesn't taste like hot liquid poo? The whole thing will call for some co-effort :).
Off to post the article on the mommy boards...
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Week 3 of consistent blogging!
That's got to be some kind of record. But I think I've figured out the secret to all of it, and that is . . . don't feel the need to wait until you have something interesting to say. Really! People will read all kinds of your ruminating crap!
I keed, I keed. I am so amazed at and grateful for the comments, so thanks to those of you who pop by! Truly, I have no expectations that anyone will actually read this, so that's a welcome surprise. Cake for all! Or try one of these chocolate cream cheese cupcakes I made last week!
Josh and I have been home since Thursday and it's been so fab, except for the fact that I haven't really done anything I told myself I'd do. Except get a mani/pedi and go grocery shopping and catch up on Vanity Fairs. Normally perfect long weekend activities for a loser homebody like myself, but actually, the purpose of taking this time off was purportedly to purchase something for our poor, as yet unprovided-for sproglet. I shit you not when I tell you that this child has nothing to his or her name except for a onesie announcing that he or she was "Made in Mexico." Great for a giggle, but seeing that that cannot be worn anywhere outside the house, fairly limited utility.
I don't know what my aversion to buying my baby stuff is! For the first three months, granted, it's that kind of scary time and you don't want to incur the attention of the gods by stockpiling too much. Then you rationalize that you have a teensy apartment and it wouldn't make sense to start getting stuff too early. Fair enough. Then you get busy at work...then you start formulating excuses...oh wait, that's just me. Most parents are chomping at the bit to get to Babies R Us while I spend hours surfing the net and bookmarking cute stuff that I never purchase. Even Josh, who is the farthest thing from a consummate shopper, is starting to be like, "Doesn't this baby need some stuff?" I think I'm just afraid of the inevitable avalanche that's going to ensue. And also, maybe, I'm sort of in denial about the whole baby thing. Or at least the imminent arrival of said baby thing.
Today. We shop! Really. Once Josh wakes up (we're lucky if it's 9am these days), I drink my coffee, eat, do my cardio and Pilates DVD, eat, check my e-mail obsessively, eat and formulate a plan of attack. Hopefully starting with brunch...
That's got to be some kind of record. But I think I've figured out the secret to all of it, and that is . . . don't feel the need to wait until you have something interesting to say. Really! People will read all kinds of your ruminating crap!
I keed, I keed. I am so amazed at and grateful for the comments, so thanks to those of you who pop by! Truly, I have no expectations that anyone will actually read this, so that's a welcome surprise. Cake for all! Or try one of these chocolate cream cheese cupcakes I made last week!
Josh and I have been home since Thursday and it's been so fab, except for the fact that I haven't really done anything I told myself I'd do. Except get a mani/pedi and go grocery shopping and catch up on Vanity Fairs. Normally perfect long weekend activities for a loser homebody like myself, but actually, the purpose of taking this time off was purportedly to purchase something for our poor, as yet unprovided-for sproglet. I shit you not when I tell you that this child has nothing to his or her name except for a onesie announcing that he or she was "Made in Mexico." Great for a giggle, but seeing that that cannot be worn anywhere outside the house, fairly limited utility.
I don't know what my aversion to buying my baby stuff is! For the first three months, granted, it's that kind of scary time and you don't want to incur the attention of the gods by stockpiling too much. Then you rationalize that you have a teensy apartment and it wouldn't make sense to start getting stuff too early. Fair enough. Then you get busy at work...then you start formulating excuses...oh wait, that's just me. Most parents are chomping at the bit to get to Babies R Us while I spend hours surfing the net and bookmarking cute stuff that I never purchase. Even Josh, who is the farthest thing from a consummate shopper, is starting to be like, "Doesn't this baby need some stuff?" I think I'm just afraid of the inevitable avalanche that's going to ensue. And also, maybe, I'm sort of in denial about the whole baby thing. Or at least the imminent arrival of said baby thing.
Today. We shop! Really. Once Josh wakes up (we're lucky if it's 9am these days), I drink my coffee, eat, do my cardio and Pilates DVD, eat, check my e-mail obsessively, eat and formulate a plan of attack. Hopefully starting with brunch...
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Springy sunshine on a Saturday morning...and the hater-ade is on tap!
Life is so good. My darling husband, gone off to the nether regions of the world for the last six days (a/k/a Toronto, Ontario), has returned to our dusty and haphazardly maintained abode and is sleeping sweetly on the couch. And yet the dog is napping next to me! Hah! The cat is asleep on the dining room table and meanwhile, no one is sleeping in the chichi dog bed purchased only last week.
By 1pm this afternoon, I had already gotten a lovely 75 minute prenatal massage at Bliss in Soho, bought myself some new goodies from Sephora and maternity wear from - le gasp - The Gap, and visited a bag that I thought I wanted at Banana Republic. Sadly, upon seeing the bag in real life, it was immediately obvious that it was Just Not On. The thing is significantly larger than my torso (yes - even pregnant)! But otherwise, a lovely morning, and when Josh got in we took a little stroll down Second Avenue and had brunch at our favorite French restaurant. Hence the napping, bien sur.
Nerds love Saturdays. Now you know. Why? Well, the Saturday Times, of course! Already two gems and I haven't even worked my way through the Style section yet. The first article just pulled at my heartstrings, and yes, you know me so well, it's about food. Farmer's markets in San Francisco, to be precise...it's like this Sharon Otterman woman has a direct window into my soul. *sigh* And she's whispering, "Leave your fugly and frigid East Coast life...come frolic in the Ferry Building, where the Acme sourdough loaves are always fresh and the Cowgirl Creamery is just a few steps away...You could just stop in on your way back to your palatial abode in Sausalito..." *whimper* I would pick up my life and move to San Francisco for the food alone in an instant. Ocean schmocean. People who wax rhapsodic about French food have never been to California, simple as that. Culinary Philistines, really.
The other article is just funny because it's a little window into my future. Park Slope: Where is the Love? is a delightful reminder that while I may have narrowly missed the one way ticket into the suburbs of New Jersey, I am still "twee"! A cliche! Have husband...dog...soon baby...off to Park Slope we go come September when the lease our current Upper East Side pad is up. By way of background, Park Slope is an increasingly ridiculous little neighborhood in Brooklyn of all places that has, in recent years, become the place to be for yuppies and their designer dogs and overscheduled offspring. It's hilarious because, as the article points out...this is Brooklyn. A couple of years ago no one would even come to a party at your house if you lived in Brooklyn. When you hail a cab to go there you still have to be half apologetic when you tell the driver your destination. Personally, I've been there about 10 times in two years, mostly for court appearances.
Park Slope in particular is achingly fashionable and correspondingly expensive. The type of apartment that we'll need will cost about $3500 a month (really, a total bargain, compared to any desirable neighborhood in Manhattan...but still!). But despite my best laid plans the outcome is inevitable. We are a stereotype. And painfully uncool.
Life is so good. My darling husband, gone off to the nether regions of the world for the last six days (a/k/a Toronto, Ontario), has returned to our dusty and haphazardly maintained abode and is sleeping sweetly on the couch. And yet the dog is napping next to me! Hah! The cat is asleep on the dining room table and meanwhile, no one is sleeping in the chichi dog bed purchased only last week.
By 1pm this afternoon, I had already gotten a lovely 75 minute prenatal massage at Bliss in Soho, bought myself some new goodies from Sephora and maternity wear from - le gasp - The Gap, and visited a bag that I thought I wanted at Banana Republic. Sadly, upon seeing the bag in real life, it was immediately obvious that it was Just Not On. The thing is significantly larger than my torso (yes - even pregnant)! But otherwise, a lovely morning, and when Josh got in we took a little stroll down Second Avenue and had brunch at our favorite French restaurant. Hence the napping, bien sur.
Nerds love Saturdays. Now you know. Why? Well, the Saturday Times, of course! Already two gems and I haven't even worked my way through the Style section yet. The first article just pulled at my heartstrings, and yes, you know me so well, it's about food. Farmer's markets in San Francisco, to be precise...it's like this Sharon Otterman woman has a direct window into my soul. *sigh* And she's whispering, "Leave your fugly and frigid East Coast life...come frolic in the Ferry Building, where the Acme sourdough loaves are always fresh and the Cowgirl Creamery is just a few steps away...You could just stop in on your way back to your palatial abode in Sausalito..." *whimper* I would pick up my life and move to San Francisco for the food alone in an instant. Ocean schmocean. People who wax rhapsodic about French food have never been to California, simple as that. Culinary Philistines, really.
The other article is just funny because it's a little window into my future. Park Slope: Where is the Love? is a delightful reminder that while I may have narrowly missed the one way ticket into the suburbs of New Jersey, I am still "twee"! A cliche! Have husband...dog...soon baby...off to Park Slope we go come September when the lease our current Upper East Side pad is up. By way of background, Park Slope is an increasingly ridiculous little neighborhood in Brooklyn of all places that has, in recent years, become the place to be for yuppies and their designer dogs and overscheduled offspring. It's hilarious because, as the article points out...this is Brooklyn. A couple of years ago no one would even come to a party at your house if you lived in Brooklyn. When you hail a cab to go there you still have to be half apologetic when you tell the driver your destination. Personally, I've been there about 10 times in two years, mostly for court appearances.
Park Slope in particular is achingly fashionable and correspondingly expensive. The type of apartment that we'll need will cost about $3500 a month (really, a total bargain, compared to any desirable neighborhood in Manhattan...but still!). But despite my best laid plans the outcome is inevitable. We are a stereotype. And painfully uncool.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Alright simmer down. I know. I'm not going to go around announcing the resurrection of this blog until blogging has been re-establish-ethed. And of course I don't have any reason as to why I stopped the last time around. Got bored...of myself, I guess. Especially since my updates would literally have been like, "Worked 14 hour day. Came home. Husband was asleep. Dog ignored me." for months on end. As for the reasons for re-starting, well, I have to give credit to my friend Megan and her endlessly entertaining pregnancy blog...and also since I am hopeless at the "pregnancy journal" thing, this will essentially accomplish the same thing.
Anyway, yes, that's right, I'm pregnant - due in September! I'm still a little stunned by it myself. I honestly didn't even really believe it until my upper stomach started protruding and I was like, "OK...that cannot be fat (unlike Lower Stomach Situation). Right??" Now, unless something very odd is happening to my digestive system, there's really no mistaking the sensations in there. It's a little alien life form kicking up his or her feet! Very cool. In about a week's time I've have one of the final ultrasounds and get to take a better look at all of his or her little appendages and stuff. I may even be inclined to share pics, so bewarned if the contents of my uterus aren't something you'd like to take a gander at over your morning bialy.
Today my plans consist of entertaining myself with a girls' brunch at my friend L's house and then coming back here to...work. Josh just left for a six day business trip (!) to Canada and so I am free to work allll afternoon and allll evening and allll night if I really really want to. I figure, though, that the re-commencement of blogging may force me to do more things. Just out of shame if nothing else! Like, "I can't go blogging about the three hours I spent comparing strollers today. Let's go to the Guggenheim!" Hee!
Anyway, yes, that's right, I'm pregnant - due in September! I'm still a little stunned by it myself. I honestly didn't even really believe it until my upper stomach started protruding and I was like, "OK...that cannot be fat (unlike Lower Stomach Situation). Right??" Now, unless something very odd is happening to my digestive system, there's really no mistaking the sensations in there. It's a little alien life form kicking up his or her feet! Very cool. In about a week's time I've have one of the final ultrasounds and get to take a better look at all of his or her little appendages and stuff. I may even be inclined to share pics, so bewarned if the contents of my uterus aren't something you'd like to take a gander at over your morning bialy.
Today my plans consist of entertaining myself with a girls' brunch at my friend L's house and then coming back here to...work. Josh just left for a six day business trip (!) to Canada and so I am free to work allll afternoon and allll evening and allll night if I really really want to. I figure, though, that the re-commencement of blogging may force me to do more things. Just out of shame if nothing else! Like, "I can't go blogging about the three hours I spent comparing strollers today. Let's go to the Guggenheim!" Hee!
Saturday, June 30, 2007
I've said it before and I'll say it again
I'm a shitty blogger. Don't judge me, I have an excuse, and I won't even patronize you by saying I've been too busy. I've just been too boring. The whole point of the blog was to share the fabulousness of my NYC lifestyle. Well, small obstacle in that my lifestyle ain't so fabulous. It's pretty much exactly the same life that every other normal person in the country lives, except with more work, more tedium and it's more expensive.
Okay, I'm exaggerating a leetle. It's been a busier summer than I expected it to be and this month Josh and I both had to travel on business and then went home to Toronto for a few days, but it's not like we've had no fun. The summer associates are here, which is pretty awesome. All the major NY law firms, investment banks, consulting firms, etc, hire summer interns as a recruiting tactic. They are expected to do some work, but mostly, we bring them over from all over the world to spend millions of dollars on them in desperate hope that they will neglect to notice the pale, pudgy, demoralized faces of the "real" associates who work at the firm and
decide to join the firm full time once they graduate from law school because it is just sew, sew fabulous to be a NY lawyer.
Okay, I'm being bitter again. Point being that with the summer associates come summer budgets to do things like eat at the swankiest restaurants, drink at the snootiest bars and manicure and pedicure ourselves to death. I've been on a healthy diet of a mani/pedi a week, checking out all the city's spas, and billing it to the firm. Life could probably be worse. Maybe.
Other than that, we've had the regular rout of social engagements and shopping and dog-centered activities that make up our life. I had a dinner party for Monsieur le French Chef et sa femme! I think it went pretty well, although clearly nothing close to his calibre of stupendousness. Before that I had a girls' brunch at my place and got totally tanked by 11am, which is always a good time. Going home to Toronto for my brother's graduation was lovely - I met my little half-sister for the first time.
More than anything I've found myself longing for a more domestic existence, though. I'm home so little and I love my home so much - my pets and my hubby and my books and my kitchen and my TV! This 700 square foot place is my favourite place to be on the weekends, which contributes a lot to my lame existence, but I can't regret it too much. We're thinking seriously about buying a place here but that raises so many serious questions about ourselves and our future that I usually get too frustrated and put it out of mind. Like, do we want to commit to a small condo in the city, and thereby commit to an insane mortgage that will force me to work at a really high paying and possibly miserable job for years and years? Or, should we move out of the city, spend a little less, but commit to a soul-crushing commute? Do we even want to live in NY for a few more years at all?
See what I mean? This isn't entertainment, it's mindless rumination. Sorry to disappoint! I promise to be back soon with some fun times. Maybe even a pic or two!
I'm a shitty blogger. Don't judge me, I have an excuse, and I won't even patronize you by saying I've been too busy. I've just been too boring. The whole point of the blog was to share the fabulousness of my NYC lifestyle. Well, small obstacle in that my lifestyle ain't so fabulous. It's pretty much exactly the same life that every other normal person in the country lives, except with more work, more tedium and it's more expensive.
Okay, I'm exaggerating a leetle. It's been a busier summer than I expected it to be and this month Josh and I both had to travel on business and then went home to Toronto for a few days, but it's not like we've had no fun. The summer associates are here, which is pretty awesome. All the major NY law firms, investment banks, consulting firms, etc, hire summer interns as a recruiting tactic. They are expected to do some work, but mostly, we bring them over from all over the world to spend millions of dollars on them in desperate hope that they will neglect to notice the pale, pudgy, demoralized faces of the "real" associates who work at the firm and
decide to join the firm full time once they graduate from law school because it is just sew, sew fabulous to be a NY lawyer.
Okay, I'm being bitter again. Point being that with the summer associates come summer budgets to do things like eat at the swankiest restaurants, drink at the snootiest bars and manicure and pedicure ourselves to death. I've been on a healthy diet of a mani/pedi a week, checking out all the city's spas, and billing it to the firm. Life could probably be worse. Maybe.
Other than that, we've had the regular rout of social engagements and shopping and dog-centered activities that make up our life. I had a dinner party for Monsieur le French Chef et sa femme! I think it went pretty well, although clearly nothing close to his calibre of stupendousness. Before that I had a girls' brunch at my place and got totally tanked by 11am, which is always a good time. Going home to Toronto for my brother's graduation was lovely - I met my little half-sister for the first time.
More than anything I've found myself longing for a more domestic existence, though. I'm home so little and I love my home so much - my pets and my hubby and my books and my kitchen and my TV! This 700 square foot place is my favourite place to be on the weekends, which contributes a lot to my lame existence, but I can't regret it too much. We're thinking seriously about buying a place here but that raises so many serious questions about ourselves and our future that I usually get too frustrated and put it out of mind. Like, do we want to commit to a small condo in the city, and thereby commit to an insane mortgage that will force me to work at a really high paying and possibly miserable job for years and years? Or, should we move out of the city, spend a little less, but commit to a soul-crushing commute? Do we even want to live in NY for a few more years at all?
See what I mean? This isn't entertainment, it's mindless rumination. Sorry to disappoint! I promise to be back soon with some fun times. Maybe even a pic or two!
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Best Dinner Party Evar.
And I didn't even host it! *sob* A few weeks ago I met up with Josh and some of his co-workers at a bar, where I met his friend Jason, a recruiter from HR. We got to talking and he casually mentioned that he happens to also be a classically trained French chef. Whaaaa? I fully thought he was tormenting me but it's true!! He also invited us over for dinner for the next night but seeing that he was half in the bag by then we just laughed at him and told him to call us over for another time.
So it was last night! And fortuitously he and his wife live like five blocks from us. Armed with a bottle of red and white, we show up, not knowing what to expect because he's kept it all sooper seekrit from Josh. And oh my gosh...every single meal I'll ever made has been put to SHAME!
We started with a glass of Prosecco and spiced olives. That's cool, something I'd likely do. Then we are called to a beautifully laid out table, poured a glass of white and the first course comes out!! It was a beautiful little portion of goat cheese nestled in puff pastry, surrounded by mache lettuce, roasted grape tomatoes and minced black olives. It was so perfectly flavoured and portioned, and just so beautiful on an oversized white plate. Already I'm thinking, shit!! I can't serve this guy butternut squash lasagna when he comes over! :)
People...he served a five course dinner!! By himself!! His wife just entertained us while Jason popped in and out of the kitchen. Truly amazing. The next course was a gorgeous little espresso cup presentation of polenta, fricasse of wild mushrooms (with the most adorable little baby enokis!), topped with more goat cheese. Incredible!! Then we had stunning little portions of seared tuna with an aromatic crust, pea shoots and this amazing spiced oil. Everything was so perfectly portioned that you could eat the whole course and not feel entirely stuffed. The final savory course was paparadelle with braised short ribs and fresh chives...aaah. By this point, though, I was fading and couldn't finish, and damn it hurt to have to leave anything on the plate. Even dessert, despite my valiant efforts, went largely uneaten by me...it was a strawberry-rhubarb clafoutis with vanilla ice cream with one of the best crusts I've ever tasted.
Suffice to say...this is the best meal I've ever had at someone's house. He clearly has the advantage of the French training but it's totally inspired to step up my own game! I'm already plotting the amazing things I'll have to make when he and his wife come over! *off to stalk RBM's food blog*
And I didn't even host it! *sob* A few weeks ago I met up with Josh and some of his co-workers at a bar, where I met his friend Jason, a recruiter from HR. We got to talking and he casually mentioned that he happens to also be a classically trained French chef. Whaaaa? I fully thought he was tormenting me but it's true!! He also invited us over for dinner for the next night but seeing that he was half in the bag by then we just laughed at him and told him to call us over for another time.
So it was last night! And fortuitously he and his wife live like five blocks from us. Armed with a bottle of red and white, we show up, not knowing what to expect because he's kept it all sooper seekrit from Josh. And oh my gosh...every single meal I'll ever made has been put to SHAME!
We started with a glass of Prosecco and spiced olives. That's cool, something I'd likely do. Then we are called to a beautifully laid out table, poured a glass of white and the first course comes out!! It was a beautiful little portion of goat cheese nestled in puff pastry, surrounded by mache lettuce, roasted grape tomatoes and minced black olives. It was so perfectly flavoured and portioned, and just so beautiful on an oversized white plate. Already I'm thinking, shit!! I can't serve this guy butternut squash lasagna when he comes over! :)
People...he served a five course dinner!! By himself!! His wife just entertained us while Jason popped in and out of the kitchen. Truly amazing. The next course was a gorgeous little espresso cup presentation of polenta, fricasse of wild mushrooms (with the most adorable little baby enokis!), topped with more goat cheese. Incredible!! Then we had stunning little portions of seared tuna with an aromatic crust, pea shoots and this amazing spiced oil. Everything was so perfectly portioned that you could eat the whole course and not feel entirely stuffed. The final savory course was paparadelle with braised short ribs and fresh chives...aaah. By this point, though, I was fading and couldn't finish, and damn it hurt to have to leave anything on the plate. Even dessert, despite my valiant efforts, went largely uneaten by me...it was a strawberry-rhubarb clafoutis with vanilla ice cream with one of the best crusts I've ever tasted.
Suffice to say...this is the best meal I've ever had at someone's house. He clearly has the advantage of the French training but it's totally inspired to step up my own game! I'm already plotting the amazing things I'll have to make when he and his wife come over! *off to stalk RBM's food blog*
Thursday, April 12, 2007
An exercise in sloth, more like...
I have a dreadful confession, which will come as no surprise to anyone who actually knows me...but drat! It's so hard to say out loud.
I am completely non-functional without my husband. I don't know how it is that I got to this point because surely I would have been mortified and put a stop to it had I been aware of it! Right?? I can't move from A to B without asking him where he put my stupid thingy...I have no idea how much we have in our accounts until he tells me to cool it with the spur of the moment drugstore sprees...I would be halfway into collections by now if he didn't know when to pay That Outrageous AmEx Bill. It's gotten to the point where every time I open my mouth to say "Hey, where's my..." he just cuts me off with "Did you LOOK for it??" The latest in my sordid tale of dependency is that I am making him wake me up to go to the gym now. Because an alarm clock just wouldn't work, now would it? No, because I'd just ignore the stupid thing. I ignore Josh, too, but he's supposed to try a few times! He also has coffee ready for me too because there's no way I'm doing anything without it at the crack of dawn. Anyway, long story short, the process malfunctioned this morning and somehow I woke up at 6:30. And then it was just too depressing to work out! It's all raining and grey out and no one would haved noticed my post-workout fabulousness anyway. Bah. Looks like I have a few more weeks of hiding under baggy clothes anyways, judging from the hideousness of the elements.
Things have been more or less tolerable since my return from Houston, although I did have to work on Good Friday. *grumble grumble* But in happy, happy news, we're taking a much needed vacation to California! Northern, of course, so it's not exactly bikini weather (as if I'd be caught dead in one anyway), but it's San Francisco! And wine country! We're doing the whole cheesy tourist schtick, including a renting a convertible and riding bikes over the rolling hills of Sonoma. It'll probably be way too cold to put the top down, and we'll be far too drunk to bike, but dammit, we'll have done it. I've never even been out to the West Coast. Isn't that obscene?? I'm seekritly hoping Josh falls in love with it and insists we move out there. :)
I have a dreadful confession, which will come as no surprise to anyone who actually knows me...but drat! It's so hard to say out loud.
I am completely non-functional without my husband. I don't know how it is that I got to this point because surely I would have been mortified and put a stop to it had I been aware of it! Right?? I can't move from A to B without asking him where he put my stupid thingy...I have no idea how much we have in our accounts until he tells me to cool it with the spur of the moment drugstore sprees...I would be halfway into collections by now if he didn't know when to pay That Outrageous AmEx Bill. It's gotten to the point where every time I open my mouth to say "Hey, where's my..." he just cuts me off with "Did you LOOK for it??" The latest in my sordid tale of dependency is that I am making him wake me up to go to the gym now. Because an alarm clock just wouldn't work, now would it? No, because I'd just ignore the stupid thing. I ignore Josh, too, but he's supposed to try a few times! He also has coffee ready for me too because there's no way I'm doing anything without it at the crack of dawn. Anyway, long story short, the process malfunctioned this morning and somehow I woke up at 6:30. And then it was just too depressing to work out! It's all raining and grey out and no one would haved noticed my post-workout fabulousness anyway. Bah. Looks like I have a few more weeks of hiding under baggy clothes anyways, judging from the hideousness of the elements.
Things have been more or less tolerable since my return from Houston, although I did have to work on Good Friday. *grumble grumble* But in happy, happy news, we're taking a much needed vacation to California! Northern, of course, so it's not exactly bikini weather (as if I'd be caught dead in one anyway), but it's San Francisco! And wine country! We're doing the whole cheesy tourist schtick, including a renting a convertible and riding bikes over the rolling hills of Sonoma. It'll probably be way too cold to put the top down, and we'll be far too drunk to bike, but dammit, we'll have done it. I've never even been out to the West Coast. Isn't that obscene?? I'm seekritly hoping Josh falls in love with it and insists we move out there. :)
Friday, March 23, 2007
Way to ruin a good run, right? I think this is the biggest gap between posts for a while!
Basically my professional life just went into a full-on meltdown mode in the last month. We had asked the court for an adjournment in the upcoming Houston trial that was (shockingly, to us anyway) denied, and so we had to go hurtling into the biggest class action in history with a few weeks' preparation. Totally insane! I basically moved into work - in the last week I billed 113 hours in seven days, including three days of working 19, 17 and 22 hours. When the actual preparation was over, I had to start preparing myself for a move to Houston, which I patched together in about a day with the help of some wardrobe boxes and a very patient husband.
Then Monday morning I board a plane for Houston, land in the early afternoon and head to pick up my luggage. While I'm standing there waiting for my bag, I'm flipping through all my e-mails and receive a new one on my Blackberry from one of the partners on the case. He's attached the text of a decision from the Fifth Circuit and a terse message: "Reversed and remanded." Those three words changed everything. For anyone who is interested in the actual legal import, you can Google "Fifth Circuit" and "Enron" (it's been all over the news), but in a nutshell - we've pretty much won without having to step foot into the courtroom. The Fifth Circuit basically said that our client could not be held liable in the way that the plaintiff was alleging and now, barring more procedural shenanigans and/or intervention by the U.S. Supreme Court, it is over. It's over! I didn't quite know what to do standing there at the airport, so I figured, I'm definitely going to stick around for the party! And party I did, for two days...oof, that was one painfully hung over flight home on Wednesday morning. Now I'm basking in two glorious days off before heading back to the office on Monday. Having no idea of what's in store, of course...I could be put on another case right away or get a brief reprieve. But anyway, that's the sordid tale of where I've been.
Sorry, I know it's not a real glimpse into my glamorous life ;). But for better or worse...this is what I do and why they pay me the big bucks! But now that New York is blooming into a reluctant spring and my entire future doesn't look blighted by this trial in Houston, there could be some interesting things around the corner. Including things like...vacations! And weekends off!
Basically my professional life just went into a full-on meltdown mode in the last month. We had asked the court for an adjournment in the upcoming Houston trial that was (shockingly, to us anyway) denied, and so we had to go hurtling into the biggest class action in history with a few weeks' preparation. Totally insane! I basically moved into work - in the last week I billed 113 hours in seven days, including three days of working 19, 17 and 22 hours. When the actual preparation was over, I had to start preparing myself for a move to Houston, which I patched together in about a day with the help of some wardrobe boxes and a very patient husband.
Then Monday morning I board a plane for Houston, land in the early afternoon and head to pick up my luggage. While I'm standing there waiting for my bag, I'm flipping through all my e-mails and receive a new one on my Blackberry from one of the partners on the case. He's attached the text of a decision from the Fifth Circuit and a terse message: "Reversed and remanded." Those three words changed everything. For anyone who is interested in the actual legal import, you can Google "Fifth Circuit" and "Enron" (it's been all over the news), but in a nutshell - we've pretty much won without having to step foot into the courtroom. The Fifth Circuit basically said that our client could not be held liable in the way that the plaintiff was alleging and now, barring more procedural shenanigans and/or intervention by the U.S. Supreme Court, it is over. It's over! I didn't quite know what to do standing there at the airport, so I figured, I'm definitely going to stick around for the party! And party I did, for two days...oof, that was one painfully hung over flight home on Wednesday morning. Now I'm basking in two glorious days off before heading back to the office on Monday. Having no idea of what's in store, of course...I could be put on another case right away or get a brief reprieve. But anyway, that's the sordid tale of where I've been.
Sorry, I know it's not a real glimpse into my glamorous life ;). But for better or worse...this is what I do and why they pay me the big bucks! But now that New York is blooming into a reluctant spring and my entire future doesn't look blighted by this trial in Houston, there could be some interesting things around the corner. Including things like...vacations! And weekends off!
Saturday, February 17, 2007
What's with the 'tude...
About etiquette? Seriously? As if using the right fork and stationery were ever meant to be so inflammatory!
Of course...anyone who knows anything about etiquette would know that it's hardly about cutlery and inner envelopes. It's about respect, courtesy, graciousness, thoughtfulness, generosity...all those things that never go out of style and are not only things that miserable old biddies with wagging fingers care about.
One issue that particularly interests me is how people who are anti-etiquette have been successful as recasting it as a class issue. I guess that's not surprising when harpies like these get play in the popular media (they had good advice in some cases but honestly, the pearl-clutching, modern martini-eschewing, Sinatra-worshipping really grated on me). I don't care about white after Labour Day, I care about good manners, and it's such a crying shame that some people seem to think that only snobby people would concern themselves with being mannerly. There is one particular poster on a forum who I would dearly love to slap, hard. She keeps screeching about how etiquette was made up by rich people and how she loves to rub her "poverty" in their faces by doing crass things. ??? As if etiquette finds poverty to be crass! What's crass is people straining to live beyond their means and expecting other people to bankroll it. There is no shame in living and entertaining simply...I would have far more respect for someone who had a lovely dessert and coffee wedding reception for everyone they wanted there than someone who felt that they had to make a big splash at a fancy hotel and then asked for cash gifts and asked me to pay for my own drinks and dinner after they clearly B-listed me.
About etiquette? Seriously? As if using the right fork and stationery were ever meant to be so inflammatory!
Of course...anyone who knows anything about etiquette would know that it's hardly about cutlery and inner envelopes. It's about respect, courtesy, graciousness, thoughtfulness, generosity...all those things that never go out of style and are not only things that miserable old biddies with wagging fingers care about.
One issue that particularly interests me is how people who are anti-etiquette have been successful as recasting it as a class issue. I guess that's not surprising when harpies like these get play in the popular media (they had good advice in some cases but honestly, the pearl-clutching, modern martini-eschewing, Sinatra-worshipping really grated on me). I don't care about white after Labour Day, I care about good manners, and it's such a crying shame that some people seem to think that only snobby people would concern themselves with being mannerly. There is one particular poster on a forum who I would dearly love to slap, hard. She keeps screeching about how etiquette was made up by rich people and how she loves to rub her "poverty" in their faces by doing crass things. ??? As if etiquette finds poverty to be crass! What's crass is people straining to live beyond their means and expecting other people to bankroll it. There is no shame in living and entertaining simply...I would have far more respect for someone who had a lovely dessert and coffee wedding reception for everyone they wanted there than someone who felt that they had to make a big splash at a fancy hotel and then asked for cash gifts and asked me to pay for my own drinks and dinner after they clearly B-listed me.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Happy Valentine's Day!
Reading over yesterday's post, I realized two things. One, that was a crazy jumble of unconnected thoughts...and two, I forgot to mention something kind of cool that happened last week. I was admitted to the bar! I am actually a lawyer now, licensed to practice in New York, appear in state court, give advice and all...and in more realistic (and immediately likely) terms, I get my own business cards and finally get to use firm letterhead to write my letters.
I'm sure some of you are like "What?? You haven't been a lawyer all this time?" It's a loooong, drawn out process! First you graduate from law school, then you write the bar exam plus an ethics exam, then you fill out a painful application and send them eleventy million references, then you show up for a character and fitness "interview", THEN, if nothing's screwed up along the way, you take the oath of office and tada. Done.
And now, for fun times, pictures of Fergus the dog.
Reading over yesterday's post, I realized two things. One, that was a crazy jumble of unconnected thoughts...and two, I forgot to mention something kind of cool that happened last week. I was admitted to the bar! I am actually a lawyer now, licensed to practice in New York, appear in state court, give advice and all...and in more realistic (and immediately likely) terms, I get my own business cards and finally get to use firm letterhead to write my letters.
I'm sure some of you are like "What?? You haven't been a lawyer all this time?" It's a loooong, drawn out process! First you graduate from law school, then you write the bar exam plus an ethics exam, then you fill out a painful application and send them eleventy million references, then you show up for a character and fitness "interview", THEN, if nothing's screwed up along the way, you take the oath of office and tada. Done.
And now, for fun times, pictures of Fergus the dog.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
It seems as though winter is finally gracing us with her presence, just in time for Valentine's Day tomorrow. A majorly shitty thing about NYC? You don't "get" snow days. If the subway's still working, you're going to work. Still, it's okay, it'll be nice to visit the flowers Josh sent me at work today! They were some beautiful lillies...my favorite! Can't wait to see if they've opened up and to smell their springy goodness!
Things have been mercifully quiet although work is definitely gearing up in preparation for the April start date of our trial (although we recently filed a motion for adjournment...pray that we get a decision soon!). We are now starting 9:30am conference calls to keep the partners abreast of what we're working on. Bleeeurgh.
Fergus is growing by leaps and bounds and actually going outside to potty now!! We took him for his first walks, all over the Upper East Side this weekend. He went to Petco and sniffed many a dog's butt. Good times. At first he was wrenching and pulling and scurrying all over the place - it took us like ten minutes to walk three blocks! - but he was in better shape on the way home. The guy loves attention - gotta give him that. People keep stopping and fussing over him and he eats it up shamelessly. It's the perfect amount of physical activity in the winter, really!
I just had to go to a new salon for an appointment this last weekend and I found myself in a stunning part of the Upper East Side I'd never seen before. Who knew? Madison in the upper 50's...stunning! Bitter jealousy-inducing! My salon was in the Fuller Building, adjacent to a Prada (but of course). That's the stuff fantasies of Manhattan are made of...art deco buildings, fabulousy expensive boutiques and couturiers, tree lined streets, yellow cabs and sleek Lincoln towncars and limos lounging outside the Hermes nonchalantly. Reality, of course, is jockeying for position on the 4 train in the morning, trying not to have your butt get too close to the pervy looking guy behind you and praying hard that the next sudden stop or lurch doesn't send you sprawling.
I did some really good pro bono work today. Not that I don't love my other cases, but they're more like your standard issue litigation which will go on and on and on until I'm dead and the worms are eating me. This was a Wills Clinic shift at the New York Presbyterian Hospital, where we draft and execute estate planning documents for indigent AIDS patients. We executed a will, power of attorney and health care proxy for two clients today. It's great work in that you get to see results almost immediately when you hand those documents over...but wow, so weird to sit there and talk to someone really calmly about their funeral arrangements and have them be an imminent reality. Not necessarily super imminent, of course, as AIDS patients can live very long and mostly healthy lives nowadays, but still. We actually have done bedside visits for very ill clients. This time was the ceremonial/formal parts of document execution (a lot of signing, legalese, notarizing, etc) but next time I'd like to do a first interview and actually discuss estate planning.
Oh, forgot to mention, almost. I went to my first New York City Ballet performance at the Lincoln Center last week. It was really so lovely. A huge perk of my job is getting free tickets to hockey games (Josh went the week before) and other cultural events. As much as I love the arts, it's not really in the New Regime (i.e.: living on a budget) to pay $80 a ticket for me to see this stuff on my own.
Things have been mercifully quiet although work is definitely gearing up in preparation for the April start date of our trial (although we recently filed a motion for adjournment...pray that we get a decision soon!). We are now starting 9:30am conference calls to keep the partners abreast of what we're working on. Bleeeurgh.
Fergus is growing by leaps and bounds and actually going outside to potty now!! We took him for his first walks, all over the Upper East Side this weekend. He went to Petco and sniffed many a dog's butt. Good times. At first he was wrenching and pulling and scurrying all over the place - it took us like ten minutes to walk three blocks! - but he was in better shape on the way home. The guy loves attention - gotta give him that. People keep stopping and fussing over him and he eats it up shamelessly. It's the perfect amount of physical activity in the winter, really!
I just had to go to a new salon for an appointment this last weekend and I found myself in a stunning part of the Upper East Side I'd never seen before. Who knew? Madison in the upper 50's...stunning! Bitter jealousy-inducing! My salon was in the Fuller Building, adjacent to a Prada (but of course). That's the stuff fantasies of Manhattan are made of...art deco buildings, fabulousy expensive boutiques and couturiers, tree lined streets, yellow cabs and sleek Lincoln towncars and limos lounging outside the Hermes nonchalantly. Reality, of course, is jockeying for position on the 4 train in the morning, trying not to have your butt get too close to the pervy looking guy behind you and praying hard that the next sudden stop or lurch doesn't send you sprawling.
I did some really good pro bono work today. Not that I don't love my other cases, but they're more like your standard issue litigation which will go on and on and on until I'm dead and the worms are eating me. This was a Wills Clinic shift at the New York Presbyterian Hospital, where we draft and execute estate planning documents for indigent AIDS patients. We executed a will, power of attorney and health care proxy for two clients today. It's great work in that you get to see results almost immediately when you hand those documents over...but wow, so weird to sit there and talk to someone really calmly about their funeral arrangements and have them be an imminent reality. Not necessarily super imminent, of course, as AIDS patients can live very long and mostly healthy lives nowadays, but still. We actually have done bedside visits for very ill clients. This time was the ceremonial/formal parts of document execution (a lot of signing, legalese, notarizing, etc) but next time I'd like to do a first interview and actually discuss estate planning.
Oh, forgot to mention, almost. I went to my first New York City Ballet performance at the Lincoln Center last week. It was really so lovely. A huge perk of my job is getting free tickets to hockey games (Josh went the week before) and other cultural events. As much as I love the arts, it's not really in the New Regime (i.e.: living on a budget) to pay $80 a ticket for me to see this stuff on my own.
Saturday, February 03, 2007
Blissful quiet...9:30 on a Saturday morning, Josh is at the gym, the dog's in his crate and all's well with the world.
Uneventful week on this front. I ate like utter crap and will continue this trend into tomorrow with my Super Bowl party. I've actually been avoiding one of my favourite blogs (MrBunsRocks', for those of you who haven't checked it out) because she recently conducted a Vegan Week experiment and I'm sure she's brimming with stories of her virtuousness. I, on the other hand, have carb bloat and my butt hurts from sitting squarely on it all week. I fully plan to work out when I get back from this morning's meeting with our investment advisor (hee! I feel so grown up) while watching 10 Things I Hate About You and reading last month's Vanity Fair. That's after we swing by the Crate & Barrel at Madison & 59th to pick up a few party supplies for tomorrow.
Work's been fairly lame. I had a bit of a meltdown this week where I decided I was going to another firm because people at my firm are Sew Meen. Then I calmed down after talking to my friend who is a fourth year at my firm. Honestly, people aren't really so much mean as they are...well, busy. No one really has time to look out for the juniors. It sucks, but I guess part of being "grown" is sucking up the little disappointments and as Lizzy would put it, putting on your big girl panties and dealing with it. Sometimes I think I'm just too soft and squishy for BigLaw. Thank god I'm not in corporate, where the super cold and uncaring bastards are. Litigators tend to have more humanity about them. On the Houston front, an appellate court will be hearing an important issue in my case next week and hopefully shortly after that we'll know if the case is going to go ahead more or less as scheduled. Wouldn't that be hilarious...my New York-based blog all of a sudden turns into The Trials and Tribulations of a Baby Lawyer in Podunk, Texas. With shining examples of literary genius in such entries as "Had Taco Bell for lunch today. Awfully hot out. This hotel bed's pretty comfortable...you know...as far as hotel beds go."
I've spent way too much time on the Internet lately, particularly at a Canada-based wedding board which I was supposed to have left a long, long time ago. It reminds me of home, so much, and there are some sweet and smart people on there, although sometimes I really have to give my head a shake and remind myself about why I "left" in the fall. There's this really pervasive attitude on there that if you don't subscribe to the school of "It's YOUR wedding! Do what YOU WANT!" then you're an evil judgmental bitch. I used to flinch against that epithet - judgmental - but honestly, I'm beginning to wonder if the negative connotations of the word have overtaken the fundamental meaning behind it. Because really, what are we without judgment? I don't judge people for essentially harmless practices that I think are just silly (such as vow renewals - another topic of discussion at a different forum) - but I come down harder on other things that I find inconsiderate or as my first year philosophy prof called it, actions that are "Other-regarding". Like, I just can't believe that it has to be explained that one's guests should be told whether they are witnessing a "wedding", based on common societal expectations and the bare definition of the word, or what is essentially a "commitment ceremony", particularly where they're flying their asses out to Mexico to attend. And the people who justify not disclosing this salient fact do so on such grounds as "the guests might not take it as seriously if they knew it wasn't a legal wedding." ?!? So you get to make that decision for them? I think somewhere along the line brides have been fed this nauseating idea that the day is All About Them. In a basic, obvious sense, yes, of course the day is about the couple and their love, etc, but to me, the principles of hospitality still trump. When you're inviting people to share that day (which is pretty integral to the process, otherwise you wouldn't invite anyone!), their comfort and enjoyment takes priority. But try telling a forum full of single-minded brides this and you're the nasty "harsh" judgmental pariah. Hooey.
Okay, enough of that. I know a lot of girls from there read here, and I don't want to offend anyone, but it does get frustrating that the discourse can be so incredibly one-sided. Who knows, if I'd spent tens of thousands on my wedding, I'd probably have gotten quite single-minded myself. I can only hope Miss Manners would have kept me grounded ;).
I should get moving. Hey - best of luck to you, Ali, if you're reading! (Ali's my brother, who is writing the LSAT next week...hopefully I haven't totally terrified you with my whining about law...you'll be great.)
Uneventful week on this front. I ate like utter crap and will continue this trend into tomorrow with my Super Bowl party. I've actually been avoiding one of my favourite blogs (MrBunsRocks', for those of you who haven't checked it out) because she recently conducted a Vegan Week experiment and I'm sure she's brimming with stories of her virtuousness. I, on the other hand, have carb bloat and my butt hurts from sitting squarely on it all week. I fully plan to work out when I get back from this morning's meeting with our investment advisor (hee! I feel so grown up) while watching 10 Things I Hate About You and reading last month's Vanity Fair. That's after we swing by the Crate & Barrel at Madison & 59th to pick up a few party supplies for tomorrow.
Work's been fairly lame. I had a bit of a meltdown this week where I decided I was going to another firm because people at my firm are Sew Meen. Then I calmed down after talking to my friend who is a fourth year at my firm. Honestly, people aren't really so much mean as they are...well, busy. No one really has time to look out for the juniors. It sucks, but I guess part of being "grown" is sucking up the little disappointments and as Lizzy would put it, putting on your big girl panties and dealing with it. Sometimes I think I'm just too soft and squishy for BigLaw. Thank god I'm not in corporate, where the super cold and uncaring bastards are. Litigators tend to have more humanity about them. On the Houston front, an appellate court will be hearing an important issue in my case next week and hopefully shortly after that we'll know if the case is going to go ahead more or less as scheduled. Wouldn't that be hilarious...my New York-based blog all of a sudden turns into The Trials and Tribulations of a Baby Lawyer in Podunk, Texas. With shining examples of literary genius in such entries as "Had Taco Bell for lunch today. Awfully hot out. This hotel bed's pretty comfortable...you know...as far as hotel beds go."
I've spent way too much time on the Internet lately, particularly at a Canada-based wedding board which I was supposed to have left a long, long time ago. It reminds me of home, so much, and there are some sweet and smart people on there, although sometimes I really have to give my head a shake and remind myself about why I "left" in the fall. There's this really pervasive attitude on there that if you don't subscribe to the school of "It's YOUR wedding! Do what YOU WANT!" then you're an evil judgmental bitch. I used to flinch against that epithet - judgmental - but honestly, I'm beginning to wonder if the negative connotations of the word have overtaken the fundamental meaning behind it. Because really, what are we without judgment? I don't judge people for essentially harmless practices that I think are just silly (such as vow renewals - another topic of discussion at a different forum) - but I come down harder on other things that I find inconsiderate or as my first year philosophy prof called it, actions that are "Other-regarding". Like, I just can't believe that it has to be explained that one's guests should be told whether they are witnessing a "wedding", based on common societal expectations and the bare definition of the word, or what is essentially a "commitment ceremony", particularly where they're flying their asses out to Mexico to attend. And the people who justify not disclosing this salient fact do so on such grounds as "the guests might not take it as seriously if they knew it wasn't a legal wedding." ?!? So you get to make that decision for them? I think somewhere along the line brides have been fed this nauseating idea that the day is All About Them. In a basic, obvious sense, yes, of course the day is about the couple and their love, etc, but to me, the principles of hospitality still trump. When you're inviting people to share that day (which is pretty integral to the process, otherwise you wouldn't invite anyone!), their comfort and enjoyment takes priority. But try telling a forum full of single-minded brides this and you're the nasty "harsh" judgmental pariah. Hooey.
Okay, enough of that. I know a lot of girls from there read here, and I don't want to offend anyone, but it does get frustrating that the discourse can be so incredibly one-sided. Who knows, if I'd spent tens of thousands on my wedding, I'd probably have gotten quite single-minded myself. I can only hope Miss Manners would have kept me grounded ;).
I should get moving. Hey - best of luck to you, Ali, if you're reading! (Ali's my brother, who is writing the LSAT next week...hopefully I haven't totally terrified you with my whining about law...you'll be great.)
Saturday, January 27, 2007
Funny how I always have the urge to blog when absolutely nothing's been going on. Now for a change I actually have news to share, which was supposed to be the purpose of this blog, as opposed to being a place to ruminate when I'd finished the internet! So here's a juicy (well - as far as my life goes) update.
We got a puppy!!
We've been talking about it for a while but I kept resisting because I thought it would be way too much work. A few weeks ago, though, my officemate N got a little Puggle and things seemed to be going really well. Her husband is a consultant, so they also have wonky hours, but with the assistance of a puppy-visiting service, they make it work. So...we were at the pet store last week getting Olivia groomed and just "happened" (nice work there, Josh) to be there when they brought in the puppies for the Adoption Hour. We fell in love with a 10 week old little guy, who they told us was a Shepherd mix, but on further examination now looks kind of like a Boxer/Lab mix.
Anyway, without further ado, here's Fergus!
You'll see why we can't "make" him for any particular breed. Apparently he's going to be big, though, because of the size of his paws. He's got a ton of energy - he's really sweet and loving and playful - and pretty smart, too. He's been hitting the pee pad about 80% of the time. There's a weird New York City thing about how dogs can't go outside until they've had all of their shots because they could catch an airborne disease, so he's being potty trained inside the house. We have a puppy visitor who comes every day at around 1:30 to play with him for half an hour. Eventually he'll start going out for a two hour walk every day. Right now he and the cat seem to have come to an uneasy truce. Poor guy - he just wants to play and stalks her (playfully) all over the apartment - and she's having none of it.
I got a raise!
Well...I personally didn't. But salaries at the New York law firms just went up! The way it works is that one firm will raise, and then all the rest have to match. Squeee for capitalism and golden handcuffs!
Okay in all seriousness though - my whole sense of money is going to be skewed for life. Going from scrounging for dollars while waiting tables to almost $200K USD for my first job?? $15K raises that drop out of the sky?? I should be thrilled - and I am, really - but it's making me almost more paranoid than ever. Isn't that weird? It's my naturally suspicious and pessimistic nature. It's like - this can't last! And it can't, of course, there's no way I could do this job for years upon years, which is why I've put us on such an aggressive saving schedule. We're putting away $31,000 (the IRS's maximum for tax free contributions) away for retirement and then $3000 per month into investments for a down payment on a property. But you know what's disgusting?? It's not enough! A decent 2-bedroom condo in Brooklyn is going to run us around $700,000, so even if we somehow manage to scare up $100,000 for a down payment, taking out a $600,000 mortgage makes me sick to my stomach. Even at a decent interest rate that's like $5000 a month, not including general costs of upkeep!
Honestly, I don't know how people do it nowadays. My next big dream is moving to California in a couple of years. I'd always sort of assumed I'd work at this firm for two years and then move on to something more manageable for the long-term, start having kids, etc. A cursory look at properties in the San Francisco area - $700,000ish again for tiny little detached homes. It's unbelievable - how do people live in these places?? I mean this is supposed to be a starter home for us. Why does anything decent cost a million dollars? And it's disgusting to be complaining because financially I can hardly complain. We're already in a better place than most of our friends in Canada (note: compared to our friends here in NYC, we're poor. Seriously. Almost all of my girlfriends at the firm are married or engaged to other lawyers, investment bankers, and hedge fund employees.) But whatever income level you're at it's never nice to think you can't achieve your goals in whatever arbitrary time horizons you'd set for yourself.
People who read this blog probably think I'm obsessed with money :/. Unfortunately I think I kind of am - I've made some choices along the way that probably haven't been for the best in the sense that I traded off a lot of things that are important to me for short-term gain. That's not to say it's necessarily a bad decision - too early to tell - but it's hard not to think of what could have been had I thought more about the long term when I was deciding what to do with my life. I live in this incredible city but it's just not doing anything for me. Maybe (hopefully??) it's just winter blahs and the general uncertainty about what's happening with my job (with the possible upcoming move to Houston for the Enron trial!) and what I'm going to do next. I feel like while people around me are making decisions and plans for the future I'm still waiting for my real life to begin - subjecting my poor husband to this too! Argh.
Hopefully I'll follow with more cheerful news shortly :). Saturday morning are Josh's budgeting time so usually by now I'm ready to crawl back into bed with a bottle of vodka.
We got a puppy!!
We've been talking about it for a while but I kept resisting because I thought it would be way too much work. A few weeks ago, though, my officemate N got a little Puggle and things seemed to be going really well. Her husband is a consultant, so they also have wonky hours, but with the assistance of a puppy-visiting service, they make it work. So...we were at the pet store last week getting Olivia groomed and just "happened" (nice work there, Josh) to be there when they brought in the puppies for the Adoption Hour. We fell in love with a 10 week old little guy, who they told us was a Shepherd mix, but on further examination now looks kind of like a Boxer/Lab mix.
Anyway, without further ado, here's Fergus!
You'll see why we can't "make" him for any particular breed. Apparently he's going to be big, though, because of the size of his paws. He's got a ton of energy - he's really sweet and loving and playful - and pretty smart, too. He's been hitting the pee pad about 80% of the time. There's a weird New York City thing about how dogs can't go outside until they've had all of their shots because they could catch an airborne disease, so he's being potty trained inside the house. We have a puppy visitor who comes every day at around 1:30 to play with him for half an hour. Eventually he'll start going out for a two hour walk every day. Right now he and the cat seem to have come to an uneasy truce. Poor guy - he just wants to play and stalks her (playfully) all over the apartment - and she's having none of it.
I got a raise!
Well...I personally didn't. But salaries at the New York law firms just went up! The way it works is that one firm will raise, and then all the rest have to match. Squeee for capitalism and golden handcuffs!
Okay in all seriousness though - my whole sense of money is going to be skewed for life. Going from scrounging for dollars while waiting tables to almost $200K USD for my first job?? $15K raises that drop out of the sky?? I should be thrilled - and I am, really - but it's making me almost more paranoid than ever. Isn't that weird? It's my naturally suspicious and pessimistic nature. It's like - this can't last! And it can't, of course, there's no way I could do this job for years upon years, which is why I've put us on such an aggressive saving schedule. We're putting away $31,000 (the IRS's maximum for tax free contributions) away for retirement and then $3000 per month into investments for a down payment on a property. But you know what's disgusting?? It's not enough! A decent 2-bedroom condo in Brooklyn is going to run us around $700,000, so even if we somehow manage to scare up $100,000 for a down payment, taking out a $600,000 mortgage makes me sick to my stomach. Even at a decent interest rate that's like $5000 a month, not including general costs of upkeep!
Honestly, I don't know how people do it nowadays. My next big dream is moving to California in a couple of years. I'd always sort of assumed I'd work at this firm for two years and then move on to something more manageable for the long-term, start having kids, etc. A cursory look at properties in the San Francisco area - $700,000ish again for tiny little detached homes. It's unbelievable - how do people live in these places?? I mean this is supposed to be a starter home for us. Why does anything decent cost a million dollars? And it's disgusting to be complaining because financially I can hardly complain. We're already in a better place than most of our friends in Canada (note: compared to our friends here in NYC, we're poor. Seriously. Almost all of my girlfriends at the firm are married or engaged to other lawyers, investment bankers, and hedge fund employees.) But whatever income level you're at it's never nice to think you can't achieve your goals in whatever arbitrary time horizons you'd set for yourself.
People who read this blog probably think I'm obsessed with money :/. Unfortunately I think I kind of am - I've made some choices along the way that probably haven't been for the best in the sense that I traded off a lot of things that are important to me for short-term gain. That's not to say it's necessarily a bad decision - too early to tell - but it's hard not to think of what could have been had I thought more about the long term when I was deciding what to do with my life. I live in this incredible city but it's just not doing anything for me. Maybe (hopefully??) it's just winter blahs and the general uncertainty about what's happening with my job (with the possible upcoming move to Houston for the Enron trial!) and what I'm going to do next. I feel like while people around me are making decisions and plans for the future I'm still waiting for my real life to begin - subjecting my poor husband to this too! Argh.
Hopefully I'll follow with more cheerful news shortly :). Saturday morning are Josh's budgeting time so usually by now I'm ready to crawl back into bed with a bottle of vodka.
Sunday, January 14, 2007
The promised leisurely update...and damn, it's a long one
Could anything be nicer than waking up on a Sunday morning and not having anywhere to go immediately? I used to cringe at the word "homebody" because it just sounded so lame. Like something nerds would describe themselves as to validate the fact that they had nowhere cool to go. But honestly? I think I'm ready to own the word. At some point I must make it to the gym, the grocery store and Banana Republic so Josh can use his shiny new gift certificate, but other than that we're free agents. And to add to the deliciousness, tomorrow's a holiday as well - Martin Luther King day here in the U.S. I just asked Josh what we'll be doing and he said "Nothing." Sweet.
I should probably say something about last weekend, right? Where I took my second vacation day in the four months I've been working? It was pretty cool - my friend Lizzy came to visit from New Hampshire and we had a really relaxing three days. On Friday evening, we went for manicures, pedicures, and then dinner at our favorite local restaurant with Josh. Saturday we left the house at a respectable 10am (ish) and took a ride on the Staten Island ferry as our one concession to the NYC Tourist Experience. It's actually a commuter ferry that some really unfortunate people take every single day to get to their homes on unfortunate Staten Island. I'm really sorry if I'm offending any Islanders reading this but good god, that is one ugly ass place. Still, it was fun to see the city skyline and sail on past the Statue of Liberty, which I've never really seen up close, and the weather was absolutely insanely gorgeous, so we stood out on deck and felt positively summery.
After that we swung by Century 21, which I'm sure I've mentioned here before (discount designer store downtown) where I tantalized Lizzy with the prospect of getting to fiercely elbow tourists in there, as the place is a zoo and a half. But so weirdly - the place was completely dead! Total let-down. Anyway, we browsed a bit and caught a glimpse of the Word Trade Center site outside, as it's right across the street. Neither of us were really up to getting up close and personal with it, especially since the place is crawling with tourists taking pictures of themselves with the site. Seriously. We stopped in really briefly at this ancient Episcopalian church right by the site - St. Paul's. There were tombstones from like the early 1700's. It's always so lovely to stumble upon little pieces of your city's history so inadvertantly. The site tells me that it's the oldest public building in continuous use in Manhattan, and was home to a significant relief effort after the September 11 attacks.
We were running kind of tight on time since we needed to be back at my place by around 5 for a small party I was throwing that night. Thankfully our cleaning lady had been in the day before and I tasked Josh with the last minute clean-up before I arrived. It's harder than you'd think, trying to get food for a party ready when you're also out all day! Anyway, we went exploring the West Village for two stores in particular - Amy's Bread and Rocco's pastry shop. From the former we got a baguette, delicious rosemary bread and an olive loaf. From the latter I got what looked like and was described to me as an Oreo cheesecake. When we actually ate it later it was orange flavored. Kind of unexpected, but not bad by any means (except for my one friend - let's call her Mel - who called it "weird"...more on her later!). After that we stopped in at Crate & Barrel where I found none of the things I needed and then flew home on the subway. All in all a pretty fun night - people came at around 8 and cleared out about 1 or so. This is what I served:
Otherwise the party was fun, we had a ton of wine and we ate ten times as much as was good for us. The next morning we got our slightly hung over asses out of bed and visited the Frick museum for a few hours. We stopped at Central Park for a hot dog afterwards and then strolled over to the Met. Both are fabulous art museums, both in their own way. The Frick is a majestic building that was once a private residence, filled with mostly portraits. The Met is far more institutional, much larger, with a greater variety of art. Loved them both. We got back, crashed and ordered Chinese food.
Monday was nothing much to write home about. We were planning to explore mid town but there was this mysterious gas smell in the area that was causing some people to have breathing problems, which is always a bad idea for asthmatics like myself. Then my plan to head to Central Park was thwarted by bad weather. So instead we ate the leftover bread and cheese from Saturday night, went to watch The Good Shepard (three hours gone, right there!) and then ordered pizza at night. I felt super guilty for not making Lizzy do more New Yorky stuff, but writing it all out it actually seems like a fairly active weekend. She was a lovely, mannerly house guest and she brought me Veuve, so I love her.
The rest of the week was pretty crazy, as I'd alluded to before, with the 20 hour day on Wednesday. We finally got to celebrate Josh's birthday last night! I took him to Morton's (gasp, I know, would any true New Yorker go to a chain steakhouse? But I've been to other NYC steakhouse institutions and wasn't particularly impressed, so there!) which was pretty good. I do agree that it's kind of overpriced for what it is - $250 for two drinks, a bottle of wine, one appetizer, two steaks, and two sides. Still, Josh wanted to go and what the man wants for his birthday, he gets! His gifts from me were Family Guy season 4 (I think?), a Banana Republic gift certificate, a subscription to Maxim (which he loves, ew) and a new iPod. Such a princess he is. It's more than we normally spend on birthdays but his one and a half year old iPod just went on the fritz and he uses one so much that I figured he deserved it. Hope it was a good one, baby!
OK that's probably more update than anyone wanted, but thanks for reading this far if you made it! Ta!
Could anything be nicer than waking up on a Sunday morning and not having anywhere to go immediately? I used to cringe at the word "homebody" because it just sounded so lame. Like something nerds would describe themselves as to validate the fact that they had nowhere cool to go. But honestly? I think I'm ready to own the word. At some point I must make it to the gym, the grocery store and Banana Republic so Josh can use his shiny new gift certificate, but other than that we're free agents. And to add to the deliciousness, tomorrow's a holiday as well - Martin Luther King day here in the U.S. I just asked Josh what we'll be doing and he said "Nothing." Sweet.
I should probably say something about last weekend, right? Where I took my second vacation day in the four months I've been working? It was pretty cool - my friend Lizzy came to visit from New Hampshire and we had a really relaxing three days. On Friday evening, we went for manicures, pedicures, and then dinner at our favorite local restaurant with Josh. Saturday we left the house at a respectable 10am (ish) and took a ride on the Staten Island ferry as our one concession to the NYC Tourist Experience. It's actually a commuter ferry that some really unfortunate people take every single day to get to their homes on unfortunate Staten Island. I'm really sorry if I'm offending any Islanders reading this but good god, that is one ugly ass place. Still, it was fun to see the city skyline and sail on past the Statue of Liberty, which I've never really seen up close, and the weather was absolutely insanely gorgeous, so we stood out on deck and felt positively summery.
After that we swung by Century 21, which I'm sure I've mentioned here before (discount designer store downtown) where I tantalized Lizzy with the prospect of getting to fiercely elbow tourists in there, as the place is a zoo and a half. But so weirdly - the place was completely dead! Total let-down. Anyway, we browsed a bit and caught a glimpse of the Word Trade Center site outside, as it's right across the street. Neither of us were really up to getting up close and personal with it, especially since the place is crawling with tourists taking pictures of themselves with the site. Seriously. We stopped in really briefly at this ancient Episcopalian church right by the site - St. Paul's. There were tombstones from like the early 1700's. It's always so lovely to stumble upon little pieces of your city's history so inadvertantly. The site tells me that it's the oldest public building in continuous use in Manhattan, and was home to a significant relief effort after the September 11 attacks.
We were running kind of tight on time since we needed to be back at my place by around 5 for a small party I was throwing that night. Thankfully our cleaning lady had been in the day before and I tasked Josh with the last minute clean-up before I arrived. It's harder than you'd think, trying to get food for a party ready when you're also out all day! Anyway, we went exploring the West Village for two stores in particular - Amy's Bread and Rocco's pastry shop. From the former we got a baguette, delicious rosemary bread and an olive loaf. From the latter I got what looked like and was described to me as an Oreo cheesecake. When we actually ate it later it was orange flavored. Kind of unexpected, but not bad by any means (except for my one friend - let's call her Mel - who called it "weird"...more on her later!). After that we stopped in at Crate & Barrel where I found none of the things I needed and then flew home on the subway. All in all a pretty fun night - people came at around 8 and cleared out about 1 or so. This is what I served:
- fresh, homemade guacamole and chips
- store bought hummus and roasted eggplant with crackers and carrot sticks
- store bought turkey meatballs and sweet & sour sauce
- a cheese plate (gouda, triple creme brie and goat cheese) with the breads described above
- store bought sweet potato chips
- nectarines and honeydew melon
- the main dish - homemade macaroni and cheese
- homemade cookies brought by C and that Oreo cheesecake
Otherwise the party was fun, we had a ton of wine and we ate ten times as much as was good for us. The next morning we got our slightly hung over asses out of bed and visited the Frick museum for a few hours. We stopped at Central Park for a hot dog afterwards and then strolled over to the Met. Both are fabulous art museums, both in their own way. The Frick is a majestic building that was once a private residence, filled with mostly portraits. The Met is far more institutional, much larger, with a greater variety of art. Loved them both. We got back, crashed and ordered Chinese food.
Monday was nothing much to write home about. We were planning to explore mid town but there was this mysterious gas smell in the area that was causing some people to have breathing problems, which is always a bad idea for asthmatics like myself. Then my plan to head to Central Park was thwarted by bad weather. So instead we ate the leftover bread and cheese from Saturday night, went to watch The Good Shepard (three hours gone, right there!) and then ordered pizza at night. I felt super guilty for not making Lizzy do more New Yorky stuff, but writing it all out it actually seems like a fairly active weekend. She was a lovely, mannerly house guest and she brought me Veuve, so I love her.
The rest of the week was pretty crazy, as I'd alluded to before, with the 20 hour day on Wednesday. We finally got to celebrate Josh's birthday last night! I took him to Morton's (gasp, I know, would any true New Yorker go to a chain steakhouse? But I've been to other NYC steakhouse institutions and wasn't particularly impressed, so there!) which was pretty good. I do agree that it's kind of overpriced for what it is - $250 for two drinks, a bottle of wine, one appetizer, two steaks, and two sides. Still, Josh wanted to go and what the man wants for his birthday, he gets! His gifts from me were Family Guy season 4 (I think?), a Banana Republic gift certificate, a subscription to Maxim (which he loves, ew) and a new iPod. Such a princess he is. It's more than we normally spend on birthdays but his one and a half year old iPod just went on the fritz and he uses one so much that I figured he deserved it. Hope it was a good one, baby!
OK that's probably more update than anyone wanted, but thanks for reading this far if you made it! Ta!
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Baby lawyer's first all nighter!
And seeing how I couldn't possibly do anything in a half arsed manner, it was for a Supreme Court brief and in a pro bono death penalty case. I suppose if you have to suffer that badly it may as well be for an actual client with a serious interest at stake, as opposed to Wachovia or Shell Oil or something...right? But okay, bit of an exaggeration - I wasn't there quite all night. I was home and in bed by 4:30. Still, I was feeling weak and nauseous by then from way too much coffee and bad food we had to order in at 3am. You know that whole thing about New York, city that never sleeps, you can get anything you want at any hour? Well, not so much in lower Manhattan, apparently. Wall Street is just not that happening at that hour. The choices in Midtown are so much better. We had to settle for disturbingly chewy mozarella sticks and sad french fries...from a place called Bully's, at that. Pretty sick. But this thing is out the door and hopefully I can be a normal person today. It's Josh's birthday, but I have a feeling it'll be another late night tonight because of another brief that needs to be cite checked before it's filed tomorrow...and of course the partners aren't done with their changes yet.
I noted the other day on a board that I used to post on, now mostly lurk and infrequently (for me anyway) contribute, that a few people live my "fabulous" NYC life vicariously through this blog. Hee! Too funny. Hi girls! I figured I was boring the crap out of people because all I really do is talk about work and complain about how expensive things are. The context in which this whole thing came up was when someone mentioned she would be moving to Manhattan for a couple of years and people were raining on her parade by holding forth about how they could never live here. I'm the last person to over-exaggerate how fabulous Manhattan is (I've only spent the last couple of weeks researching Anywhere Else In The World to move to) but seriously, what gives, people? Whatever happened to manners? Would anyone ever be like "Wow, you're moving to the Prairies? Holy shit it's boring there. How could you live with all those hicks, in that cold?" Well, I guess some people would say stuff like that, because they're rude.
Anyway - being at work until 4 in the morning does not give you a free pass for the next day, at least as a Manhattan lawyer (!) so I'd better eventually shower and stuff. More update soon, I hope.
And seeing how I couldn't possibly do anything in a half arsed manner, it was for a Supreme Court brief and in a pro bono death penalty case. I suppose if you have to suffer that badly it may as well be for an actual client with a serious interest at stake, as opposed to Wachovia or Shell Oil or something...right? But okay, bit of an exaggeration - I wasn't there quite all night. I was home and in bed by 4:30. Still, I was feeling weak and nauseous by then from way too much coffee and bad food we had to order in at 3am. You know that whole thing about New York, city that never sleeps, you can get anything you want at any hour? Well, not so much in lower Manhattan, apparently. Wall Street is just not that happening at that hour. The choices in Midtown are so much better. We had to settle for disturbingly chewy mozarella sticks and sad french fries...from a place called Bully's, at that. Pretty sick. But this thing is out the door and hopefully I can be a normal person today. It's Josh's birthday, but I have a feeling it'll be another late night tonight because of another brief that needs to be cite checked before it's filed tomorrow...and of course the partners aren't done with their changes yet.
I noted the other day on a board that I used to post on, now mostly lurk and infrequently (for me anyway) contribute, that a few people live my "fabulous" NYC life vicariously through this blog. Hee! Too funny. Hi girls! I figured I was boring the crap out of people because all I really do is talk about work and complain about how expensive things are. The context in which this whole thing came up was when someone mentioned she would be moving to Manhattan for a couple of years and people were raining on her parade by holding forth about how they could never live here. I'm the last person to over-exaggerate how fabulous Manhattan is (I've only spent the last couple of weeks researching Anywhere Else In The World to move to) but seriously, what gives, people? Whatever happened to manners? Would anyone ever be like "Wow, you're moving to the Prairies? Holy shit it's boring there. How could you live with all those hicks, in that cold?" Well, I guess some people would say stuff like that, because they're rude.
Anyway - being at work until 4 in the morning does not give you a free pass for the next day, at least as a Manhattan lawyer (!) so I'd better eventually shower and stuff. More update soon, I hope.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Thank you all for the nice greetings and birthday wishes over the last few days. By the way, another reason for you all to put it in a comment in the blog? When I got those e-mail notification thingies about new comments I remember I have a blog, and then I remember to update it! This one's going to be a doozy!
This was our first Christmas spent away from Josh's family. It was just us and the cat...and my friend Mark and his brother came over for dinner. It was low key, it was casual and it was actually pretty darned nice. I had wondered if inevitable family drama was that certain je ne sais quoi of a proper Christmas but actually you can do jeeeest fine without. Plus you can get the presents portion done by noon, as opposed to 5 a.m. We had some (store bought) appetizers of spiced olives, hot phyllo hors d'ouevres, rosemary chips and Max Brenner chocolates (provided by Mark and Chris) and then for dinner we had herbed roast beef, scalloped potatoes gratin, yorkshire pudding and tomato and onion salad. For dessert I made chocolate orange pots de creme which even Josh said were good, and he's not a fan of the chocolate/fruit combos. If Mark sends me a picture of the food I'll be sure to add it in here.
I went back to work yesterday (yup, on my birthday!) because I actually did have work to do and a status conference to attend at court. I don't know if I'll ever quite get over the fact that court is nowhere near as glamorous as I grew up thinking it would be. Even once in law school, when you haughtily think you've left all your Law & Order illusions behind, you cling to some of those fantasies...then you actually go to court repeatedly and realize what a gong show the whole thing is. Yesterday we spent the first fifteen minutes at court being verbally bitchslapped by a very irate client (something that the movies and T.V. don't quite prepare you for). Then the judge arrived and we all stood, as is proper and at one with my expectations from movies and T.V., so we were back on track. Then the "hearing", consisting of setting a date for the next status conference, took place over the next three minutes. The most disconcerting thing was that once the date was set? The judge sat back in his chair and started shooting the shit with his clerk and stenographer. None of that "all rise" and making a dignified exit or anything. Then the attorneys sauntered off from their podium and started chatting too, all while the judge was still lounging about in his chair and for all I knew court was still in session since no one had said we were adjourned. ??? Weird. Where is my pomp? Where is my circumstance? Why did I sign up for this if not for the trappings??
I've mostly gotten over the angst of my job being nothing like Hollywood. It just sometimes rankles. It's especially annoying with the pro bono ("for the public good", i.e., free) work because the whole point is supposed to be that you're helping people who need it. It kind of crushes your illusions though when you realize that half the time your client thinks that you're God and that you're going to get the Supreme Court, the U.N. and Bono to champion his case because you're Just That Good, and the other half your client hates you and thinks that you must be crap because you're working for free. I'll always do the pro bono work because I just think it's the right thing to do, and the firm is very encouraging of it, but damn is it ever demoralizing sometimes, especially in the criminal context because you really have such a slim chance of actually winning. There's no fighting the good fight, crusading for your poor innocent downtrodden client against all odds and making a powerful legal argument that makes the judge weep with its eloquence. There's just fighting for fair process in the end. Whether that leads to fair results, I can't even say because I don't know what that looks like yet. I'm not sure if I'll ever know, really. That's why we have Hollywood, though, right?
Anyway - another year older, another year wiser. My cousin started this new birthday listing thing this year that tells us whenever there's a birthday in our (very large) family via e-mail, so I got a lot of birthday wishes this year. Always a nice thing. My mom and stepdad sent me flowers at work! That was exceptionally sweet. I've never gotten flowers at work before (yes, probably because I've never worked before...shaddup). It felt awfully grown up. They are really gorgeous too - red roses and white lilies and orchids! I felt terribly guilty though, because delivered flowers are sooo expensive. Even a small, simple arrangement of wildflowers cost an arm and a leg. Then last night we went for dinner with my officemate Nina and her husband Chris, which was totally exciting in and of itself because all through school no one was ever around to celebrate my birthday - not even just a casual dinner or anything because everyone just scattered over the holidays. Not only did they have dinner with us but they picked up the check, which was so incredibly nice. We are so lucky to know cool people here already. We're even invited to a New Year's house party, which was really unexpected and nice.
All the best to everyone in 2007! *Hugs* and as always thanks for reading!!
This was our first Christmas spent away from Josh's family. It was just us and the cat...and my friend Mark and his brother came over for dinner. It was low key, it was casual and it was actually pretty darned nice. I had wondered if inevitable family drama was that certain je ne sais quoi of a proper Christmas but actually you can do jeeeest fine without. Plus you can get the presents portion done by noon, as opposed to 5 a.m. We had some (store bought) appetizers of spiced olives, hot phyllo hors d'ouevres, rosemary chips and Max Brenner chocolates (provided by Mark and Chris) and then for dinner we had herbed roast beef, scalloped potatoes gratin, yorkshire pudding and tomato and onion salad. For dessert I made chocolate orange pots de creme which even Josh said were good, and he's not a fan of the chocolate/fruit combos. If Mark sends me a picture of the food I'll be sure to add it in here.
I went back to work yesterday (yup, on my birthday!) because I actually did have work to do and a status conference to attend at court. I don't know if I'll ever quite get over the fact that court is nowhere near as glamorous as I grew up thinking it would be. Even once in law school, when you haughtily think you've left all your Law & Order illusions behind, you cling to some of those fantasies...then you actually go to court repeatedly and realize what a gong show the whole thing is. Yesterday we spent the first fifteen minutes at court being verbally bitchslapped by a very irate client (something that the movies and T.V. don't quite prepare you for). Then the judge arrived and we all stood, as is proper and at one with my expectations from movies and T.V., so we were back on track. Then the "hearing", consisting of setting a date for the next status conference, took place over the next three minutes. The most disconcerting thing was that once the date was set? The judge sat back in his chair and started shooting the shit with his clerk and stenographer. None of that "all rise" and making a dignified exit or anything. Then the attorneys sauntered off from their podium and started chatting too, all while the judge was still lounging about in his chair and for all I knew court was still in session since no one had said we were adjourned. ??? Weird. Where is my pomp? Where is my circumstance? Why did I sign up for this if not for the trappings??
I've mostly gotten over the angst of my job being nothing like Hollywood. It just sometimes rankles. It's especially annoying with the pro bono ("for the public good", i.e., free) work because the whole point is supposed to be that you're helping people who need it. It kind of crushes your illusions though when you realize that half the time your client thinks that you're God and that you're going to get the Supreme Court, the U.N. and Bono to champion his case because you're Just That Good, and the other half your client hates you and thinks that you must be crap because you're working for free. I'll always do the pro bono work because I just think it's the right thing to do, and the firm is very encouraging of it, but damn is it ever demoralizing sometimes, especially in the criminal context because you really have such a slim chance of actually winning. There's no fighting the good fight, crusading for your poor innocent downtrodden client against all odds and making a powerful legal argument that makes the judge weep with its eloquence. There's just fighting for fair process in the end. Whether that leads to fair results, I can't even say because I don't know what that looks like yet. I'm not sure if I'll ever know, really. That's why we have Hollywood, though, right?
Anyway - another year older, another year wiser. My cousin started this new birthday listing thing this year that tells us whenever there's a birthday in our (very large) family via e-mail, so I got a lot of birthday wishes this year. Always a nice thing. My mom and stepdad sent me flowers at work! That was exceptionally sweet. I've never gotten flowers at work before (yes, probably because I've never worked before...shaddup). It felt awfully grown up. They are really gorgeous too - red roses and white lilies and orchids! I felt terribly guilty though, because delivered flowers are sooo expensive. Even a small, simple arrangement of wildflowers cost an arm and a leg. Then last night we went for dinner with my officemate Nina and her husband Chris, which was totally exciting in and of itself because all through school no one was ever around to celebrate my birthday - not even just a casual dinner or anything because everyone just scattered over the holidays. Not only did they have dinner with us but they picked up the check, which was so incredibly nice. We are so lucky to know cool people here already. We're even invited to a New Year's house party, which was really unexpected and nice.
All the best to everyone in 2007! *Hugs* and as always thanks for reading!!
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
It's 8:07 a.m. on a Wednesday morning and I'm lounging on my couch, unshowered, just coming off my most recent period of madness at work. Normally I leave the house at around 8:45 to get to work for around 9:30 but I'm treating myself to a late start today. Fortunately we aren't forced to have any real set hours at work so no one really cares about when you get in. Definitely one perk of being a so-called professional ;).
Last week I got put on a new assignment, which brings me up to five cases - three paying clients and two pro bono criminal cases (one appellate, one that will likely end up as a plea bargain). They all sort of just vomited on me last week, with every single one becoming active. That doesn't happen too often but when it does, frankly, it's just not cool. I had a few 14 hour days in there, plus a 12 hour day on Saturday. It's probably still not over, but I'm not above taking advantage of a quiet moment or two in the middle of it all. It could definitely be worse - my girlfriend on a bigger case billed 100 hours over six days last week. She was working until 6 am every day, going home to shower and sleep for a few hours and coming back. Total madness. I'm already stealthily thinking of my exit options...not because it's overall such a horrible place to be, at least not in the short term, but I just don't understand how anyone could keep this up as a lifestyle choice. They must have more fortitude than me, or at least be able to turn down assignments with more good grace, because I haven't discovered that trick yet. I'm a people pleaser. I tried to book off two vacations days - that's right, days - and am cancelling both because there is just too much going on for me to be gone for a day at a time. No wonder so many of us turn to drink!
Last week I got put on a new assignment, which brings me up to five cases - three paying clients and two pro bono criminal cases (one appellate, one that will likely end up as a plea bargain). They all sort of just vomited on me last week, with every single one becoming active. That doesn't happen too often but when it does, frankly, it's just not cool. I had a few 14 hour days in there, plus a 12 hour day on Saturday. It's probably still not over, but I'm not above taking advantage of a quiet moment or two in the middle of it all. It could definitely be worse - my girlfriend on a bigger case billed 100 hours over six days last week. She was working until 6 am every day, going home to shower and sleep for a few hours and coming back. Total madness. I'm already stealthily thinking of my exit options...not because it's overall such a horrible place to be, at least not in the short term, but I just don't understand how anyone could keep this up as a lifestyle choice. They must have more fortitude than me, or at least be able to turn down assignments with more good grace, because I haven't discovered that trick yet. I'm a people pleaser. I tried to book off two vacations days - that's right, days - and am cancelling both because there is just too much going on for me to be gone for a day at a time. No wonder so many of us turn to drink!
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
I'm so excited by the discovery that people actually still read this that I'm inspired to post again. That, and the 7:30 a.m. meeting that I was supposed to attend this morning was pushed back to 8:00 and I didn't realize it until I woke up at an indecent hour and checked my Blackberry. So, may as well update while I can.
I think the most recent string of celebrity divorces is giving me some kind of subconscious angst. I'm so not a stressful wife in any way, but I had this awful, vivid dream last night that Josh had an affair and left me for a very young blonde girl who looked suspiciously like Carrie Underwood. This dream went on forever! I had a few hysterical fits and tried to beat the crap out of him more than once during it...and even when I woke up I was disoriented and sad. Totally strange to feel that kind of violence of emotion while dreaming and then still feel it once you've woken up.
I left work at the unheard of (well, in recent weeks) hour of 6:30 last night to hit Macy's. The festive decor at the department stores in New York City is truly something you have to see at least once in your lifetime. Every suburbanite in a 100 mile radius drags their kids here to look at the windows, which accounts for much of the insane foot traffic in those areas on the weekends. Still, it's not something you can bask in for too long because the frenzied pace follows you everywhere. I just went to find a reasonably priced (!) clutch for this black tie dinner I'm attended on Saturday that I had seen on their website, but no banana when I actually arrived - apparently not everything that they have on their website is available in the store. I did learn, however that there are some fugly purses out there selling for prices that you would. not. believe.
While we've on the topic of prices that you wouldn't believe...there's been something that's been bugging me lately and that is, who are these people browing the Michael Kors and Chloe bags at every department store I go into and how can they all have so much more money than I do? I'm genuinely curious. This entire city seems full of people with limitless disposable income and I don't know if it's just because billionaire hedge fund managers' wives casually shop at Barneys with the rest of us or I'm just doing something terribly wrong with my income management.
I make a decent salary and yet to me, a handbag from Banana Republic is a naughty indulgence. I used to feel fairly well dressed with most of my clothes from Banana or Ann Taylor but compared to the other lawyers at my firm I feel frumpy and poor - lost in a sea of Jimmy Choo, Prada and Coach on the cheap end. I have a mental block against feeling that $600 is a reasonable price to pay for a handbag, I think, even though this city has already completely warped my preconceived notions of what a "lot of money" is (happens when $3000 a month goes to rent alone!). I feel like I'm occupying a strange place right now, wanting to fit in and be stylish and not stand out as "that girl in the hideous polyester pants and faux croc shoes" but neither do I want to completely succumb to the pressures around me. Someone reccommended this book, The Overspent American, that I think I'm going to check out for some validation over Christmas.
Morgan - if you're reading this - best wishes for your wedding in ten days!! From what I hear about the weather in your city right now you'll have the perfect winter day that you were planning for. Can't wait to see pics :).
I think the most recent string of celebrity divorces is giving me some kind of subconscious angst. I'm so not a stressful wife in any way, but I had this awful, vivid dream last night that Josh had an affair and left me for a very young blonde girl who looked suspiciously like Carrie Underwood. This dream went on forever! I had a few hysterical fits and tried to beat the crap out of him more than once during it...and even when I woke up I was disoriented and sad. Totally strange to feel that kind of violence of emotion while dreaming and then still feel it once you've woken up.
I left work at the unheard of (well, in recent weeks) hour of 6:30 last night to hit Macy's. The festive decor at the department stores in New York City is truly something you have to see at least once in your lifetime. Every suburbanite in a 100 mile radius drags their kids here to look at the windows, which accounts for much of the insane foot traffic in those areas on the weekends. Still, it's not something you can bask in for too long because the frenzied pace follows you everywhere. I just went to find a reasonably priced (!) clutch for this black tie dinner I'm attended on Saturday that I had seen on their website, but no banana when I actually arrived - apparently not everything that they have on their website is available in the store. I did learn, however that there are some fugly purses out there selling for prices that you would. not. believe.
While we've on the topic of prices that you wouldn't believe...there's been something that's been bugging me lately and that is, who are these people browing the Michael Kors and Chloe bags at every department store I go into and how can they all have so much more money than I do? I'm genuinely curious. This entire city seems full of people with limitless disposable income and I don't know if it's just because billionaire hedge fund managers' wives casually shop at Barneys with the rest of us or I'm just doing something terribly wrong with my income management.
I make a decent salary and yet to me, a handbag from Banana Republic is a naughty indulgence. I used to feel fairly well dressed with most of my clothes from Banana or Ann Taylor but compared to the other lawyers at my firm I feel frumpy and poor - lost in a sea of Jimmy Choo, Prada and Coach on the cheap end. I have a mental block against feeling that $600 is a reasonable price to pay for a handbag, I think, even though this city has already completely warped my preconceived notions of what a "lot of money" is (happens when $3000 a month goes to rent alone!). I feel like I'm occupying a strange place right now, wanting to fit in and be stylish and not stand out as "that girl in the hideous polyester pants and faux croc shoes" but neither do I want to completely succumb to the pressures around me. Someone reccommended this book, The Overspent American, that I think I'm going to check out for some validation over Christmas.
Morgan - if you're reading this - best wishes for your wedding in ten days!! From what I hear about the weather in your city right now you'll have the perfect winter day that you were planning for. Can't wait to see pics :).
Sunday, November 26, 2006
As a result of the terse directive I received in my inbox from my brother recently ("Update!") I became sufficiently ashamed at my lameness to update this blog. Truth be told - it's hard to update a blog when you have nothing much to discuss besides work...and all aspects of your work are confidential...and any indiscretions are likely to end up posted on Gawker. I'm digging deep here to think up fabulous things.
To get work out of the way - it's definitely busy. Only one of my cases has been really active but it's been keeping me sufficiently busy. A normal day is fairly quiet until about 3 or so, when the partners call me in to give me work, and then I end up working until 9 or so. It's just the cycle we tend to work on at the firm. The partners are crazy busy with meetings all day and then they remember me and the work they want to give me in the afternoon. It's all interesting work, but the learning curve is steep, and I spend most of my time near-catatonic with fear that I'm screwing everything up massively. Still - not fired yet - and most of the more senior associates assure us that this is just how everyone feels when they first start.
In other fascinating news - I found out I passed the bar a couple of weeks ago. There aren't words to express what a relief that was. I was physically nauseous every time I thought of the results for at least a week before. So, I'm now "certified" to go for my Character & Fitness interview, where they figure out if I'm...fit, I guess. Apparently it's not too searching an inquiry. Thank god for small mercies, right?
It's not all work and no play, of course. Josh and I have managed to spend like drunken sailors - there always seems to be something fabulous to drop a lot of money on. Our social activities mostly consist of lazy brunches and swanky dinners with friends, most of whom I know through work. Josh is more proficient than ever in lawyerspeak. We just celebrated American Thanksgiving with an old friend who was in town with his girlfriend. And very cool news - Josh is starting his job tomorrow! It's the same type of work, in a totally new industry, and they are paying him more money than he made in Toronto! Which is great for me, because I can now rest assured that I totally didn't ruin his career by dragging him here.
I'm sure that's enough for now ;). I love your comments so pleeeease keep sending!
To get work out of the way - it's definitely busy. Only one of my cases has been really active but it's been keeping me sufficiently busy. A normal day is fairly quiet until about 3 or so, when the partners call me in to give me work, and then I end up working until 9 or so. It's just the cycle we tend to work on at the firm. The partners are crazy busy with meetings all day and then they remember me and the work they want to give me in the afternoon. It's all interesting work, but the learning curve is steep, and I spend most of my time near-catatonic with fear that I'm screwing everything up massively. Still - not fired yet - and most of the more senior associates assure us that this is just how everyone feels when they first start.
In other fascinating news - I found out I passed the bar a couple of weeks ago. There aren't words to express what a relief that was. I was physically nauseous every time I thought of the results for at least a week before. So, I'm now "certified" to go for my Character & Fitness interview, where they figure out if I'm...fit, I guess. Apparently it's not too searching an inquiry. Thank god for small mercies, right?
It's not all work and no play, of course. Josh and I have managed to spend like drunken sailors - there always seems to be something fabulous to drop a lot of money on. Our social activities mostly consist of lazy brunches and swanky dinners with friends, most of whom I know through work. Josh is more proficient than ever in lawyerspeak. We just celebrated American Thanksgiving with an old friend who was in town with his girlfriend. And very cool news - Josh is starting his job tomorrow! It's the same type of work, in a totally new industry, and they are paying him more money than he made in Toronto! Which is great for me, because I can now rest assured that I totally didn't ruin his career by dragging him here.
I'm sure that's enough for now ;). I love your comments so pleeeease keep sending!
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